Today, I’ve something stuck in my craw, and I need to vent (I know, shock!):

I don’t know if Dr. Wayne Dyer originated it, but he famously quoted: “When you have the choice between being right, or being kind—choose kind.”

choose kind

And I believe that whenever we engage with others—be it personal interactions throughout the course of the day, or participation in discussions on social media, or whatever—we have a choice to either add value, add to the synergy—or detract from the interaction, add nothing of value, and instead just generally be a nuisance. 

Essentially, we can choose to either be a positive influence, or a negative one, on those with which we interact, have either a positive impact, or a negative one, upon situations in which we find ourselves.

But I’ve found that there are many who insist upon seeking out any little detail about someone, or about what they’ve said, which might be incorrect or inaccurate—even when it’s totally immaterial to the point being made, or within the context of the discussion, or totally irrelevant to the situation at hand—and do nothing but seize upon those tiny, insignificant flaws and then flail about, attempting to correct everyone—rather than contributing something of value to the discussion or situation—and in doing so accomplish nothing aside from ruining the experience for everyone involved, or even exacerbating the situation or escalating conflict.

Pointing out the tiny errors or imperfections in everyone around you doesn’t make you look good, seem smart, or appear superior—it just makes you a really annoying person to be around.

We could even get biblical about it: remove the plank from your own eye, before trying to remove the spec from your brother’s…let he who is without sin cast the first stone…but suffice it to simply say: a little humility can go a long way.

It’s much more important in life to be helpful to others, than to prove you’re right.

So if you find yourself without many friends, you might want to assess how it is that you treat others, whether you add or detract value to discussions or situations, whether you’re a positive influence or a negative one on others, have a positive impact or a negative one on situations. And, it’s advisable to consider: if you encounter assholes all day, every day—chances are pretty good that YOU’RE the asshole.

So, in my always humble opinion: if you’re the above described type of person—always insistent upon being right, rather than being helpful—then as far as I’m concerned, you can just take your “rightness” all the way to your grave—because “aloneness” is, in fact, the one thing that you actually can take with you.

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