Somebody posted the following quote on Facebook the other day, and I thought it worth sharing:
“You need to learn how to select your thoughts, just the same way you select your clothes every day. That’s a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.” ~ Elizabeth GilbertI totally agree.
Along those lines, this is what I’ve discovered from my own experience over the years:
First, you learn to control your emotions, keep them in check; then, you learn to actually choose your emotions, which essentially means choosing your thoughts (as Gilbert suggests above); but then, you can actually get ahead of the ball, when you realize that in all incidents, circumstances, interactions, etc., people tend to see what they want to see, i.e., what they’re looking for, i.e., what they expect (based on biases, prejudices, assumptions, fears, presuppositions, etc.), and it is possible—in fact, essential to acheiving happiness—to change your expectations.
As for me, once I realized this, I started looking for (expecting) the positive in all things, all circumstances, all interactions…and suddenly, I started seeing the positive everywhere, instead of the negative!So, in summary:
- 1) Change your expectations, change your perception;
- 2) Change your perception, change your experiences;
- 3) Change your experiences, change your life!